katelyn_333

Hello,

Thu, 11 Sep 2008 18:07:27 GMT

I haven't been on in a while. I'm starting back on ABC tomorrow. Going balls to the wall, ALL or nothing. I seriously let so much go this summer. I moved to Wyoming, with my ex boyfriend.. and moved back in four days, we broke up. I am much happier with out him. I'm sick of not having control. I need advice for getting back on ABC, like... my parents have so many sweets in the house, and its really bad because I have a sweet tooth, and it sucks. So I need some advice for getting back on ABC, I made a new note book... and I'm gonna get on here a lot more, for support. and text my LJ friends and what not.

HELP PLEASE!!!!

Hey ya'll

Tue, 17 Jun 2008 21:57:24 GMT

So I am in North Carolina, bored out of my mind. Its pretty damn hot here, so I've been laying out in the sun a lot. I got here yesterday, and i bought lots of fruit and veggies which i was excited to eat. but last night I went to all u can eat sushi, which is a weakness... I ate a lot. and my grandpa bitches at me for not eating, so I'm in a pickle. but I got over the flu a day or two ago, and I lost ten pounds from throwing up, and well... something else.. and also not eating. Which was nice, but i felt like shit. Well I hadn't been on in a while and since there is absolutely nothing to do here I figured I'd blog a little. Hope everyone else is doing well!
Good Luck girls

Pictures.

Wed, 14 May 2008 20:06:37 GMT

This is me a few nights ago, i didn't rotate them or anything. I think i'm making some progress.

and I FINALLY FIGURED THIS OUT
so here are some pictures from prom! FINALLY!

sorry these are so random i know, but I told someone a while ago that i would post some pictues, so here they are!

so..

Wed, 14 May 2008 19:48:52 GMT

my fast got ruined. i had a egg white that was scrambled. but i needed protine i was getting dizzy. god i'm so stupidi can't go too long with out food.

GOSH!

on a bit of a happier note.

Wed, 14 May 2008 15:32:36 GMT

Backstreet boys: Incomplete. lol

I still am in love with them.

Fasting

Wed, 14 May 2008 15:27:56 GMT

Today, I'm fasting, because of my careless binging i've been doing the past three days. I can't take it anymore, no wonder why I'm feeling depressed.
I feel like my life is just so completly out of my control, my brother leaving, the earth quake in china where one of my other brothers is, my stupid father, and my mom being stressed out, ashley bein upset, john and bubba being so rude and just selfish. I can't do anything about this stuff. I'm so annoyed and stressed out these days, I think i need to go running, but the weather has been so shitty still. In oregon the weather is supposed to be nice in may thru august, no no no its grey and rainy here, i hate it right now. School sucks balls, my mom told me shes not sending me to montana next year. I just want to give up. I honestly dont care anymore.
Right now, of course i have to have coffee, plus it will help clear out my system for the day, but thats pretty much all, maybe i'll go get a diet coke, and some crystal light thingys.

I just want to be happy about everything, including myself.
Good luck everyone else
♥
--Katelyn--

Mon, 12 May 2008 18:27:39 GMT

today. UHG I hate when people go to mcdonnalds and eat like 20 hashbrowns. My friend John(kinda boyfriend I don't really know its so complicating), but anyways, he eats and he is in perfect shape for a guy( I love love love his body, but ANYWAYS)and he will offer me bites and stuff and I love hash browns, and I had a bite and I feel really guilty. :( I'm sorry, i'm sorry i'm sorry to my self for all my hard work going down the drain because i can't freaking control my stupid self. gosh. SCREW THIS! GOD! I need to go run, and do abs, and but, and arms, and legs. :( :( :(

but I like John... A lot.But his mom hates me for like no reason, she smokes cigarettes too, and she thinks I do like hard drugs, and smoke weed. NO NO NO I don't the only thing I do that is wrong is smoke(Cigs), chew(rarely), and drink sometimes. GRRR

Angry.
Good Luck girl
♥

Chubby Cheeks.

Sun, 11 May 2008 18:30:39 GMT

one of my friends always tells me i have chubby cheeks, and it makes me feel like my whole body is chubby. GAH!
and my parents are still bithcing at me about food.
my brother is moving to new york.
and I dont know if i'm going to graduate from high school.

but my fast is going well. so far nothing today, and i ate brocoli all day yesterday and i honestly had like 4 diet cokes yesterday.

Fri, 09 May 2008 16:55:53 GMT

poopy. i was supposed to fast, i just ate, but fuck. my pants ripped this morning cause i got then out of the ddryer, and they ripped, they're my favorite. :( and my mom called me fat. wow wonderful.

today

Fri, 09 May 2008 05:06:44 GMT

was... alright. So my ex/semi current/i dunno what he is boyfriend and i were hanging out and he invited to me to dinner with his family, and i love love love his family, they're better than my family. Anyway so were sitting at the table, and they're all eatting nasty tacos and I was having veggi broth and a diet coke, and some lettace, which is so good, but anyways, they're all looking at me like I'm weird or something because usually I wait until night to eat a little something, and today I didn't, so I couldn't have any calories, so I was eatting that and his grandma goes, why haven't I seen you eat in like a week, and Brandon laughs, and goes, she doesn't eat. I was like shut up what am I doing right now? and than i went over to my friend jake and jordans, they ordered pizza and asked me if i wanted any, and i said no cause i was full. and they asked what I ate, and me being honest, told them. and they sit there and make fun of me all day its so annoying. they're like " a cruton fills you up katelyn, a piece of celery fills you up." and i just put on there boxing gloves and punched there arms, which resulted in a 3 on one wrestling match, which i probably burned a bunch of caloires because I was laughing so hard.
Tommorow, I want to eat nothing, nothing, nothing. It will be so hard... but I WILL do it.
tips? PLEASSSSE help!

Love you girls!(and guys)

♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥
Katelyn

this made me smile and laugh

Tue, 06 May 2008 06:00:49 GMT

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_OBlgSz8sSM

the babies laugh is so cute.

I will not.....

Tue, 06 May 2008 05:44:22 GMT

purge. uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. I ate WAY to much! god i feel like shit. I've ate way to much today. I will not purge, i will not!!! purge, i want to so bad though! Like I can feel it wanting to come up! UH!
I had half a piece of bread with cheese and tuna melted on it. and tomato soup. and like 4 cups of water. and for lunch i had subway! I haven't had a full blown binge day in a while, and i did today and i want to cry.
UH! i'm in such a bad mood, i was in a good mood before i came home. :(
I WILL NOT PURGE! I WILL NOT!!!!!!!!
(i might though)

tomorrow better be better than this.

:(

Mon, 05 May 2008 05:36:19 GMT

Okay not to sound ridiculos, because this has NOTHING to do with food, or anything. But I wanted to cut my hair, just a little bit, like a trim... than i moved my my bangs... and RUINED THEM! they're short and look like shit. wow, I'm sorry if i sound like a brat but I have a job interview tommorow and i look so freaking UGLY!

:( :( :(

i'm sorry to post this but i'm super upset.

wow im sorry for all the posts

Mon, 05 May 2008 02:42:10 GMT

so my family just ate dinner, and luckly the mexican food my mom made was soooooooooooooo gross! so i had brocoli, and she bitched at me because i wasn't eating the food she made and how there are starving children in africa. i hate that line, like i know there are, but what am i gonna do, wrap up this sick egg cheese milk chili thing and send it to them?

gah!
well time for cindy crawford abs of steel, buns of steel haha i know cheesy but there fun and a work out!

WAIT I HAVE SOMETHING EXCITING TO SAY

Mon, 05 May 2008 02:02:53 GMT

So I have been striving to have my spine show, and my colar bones (more) and my hips.. and last night i saw some friends and they gave me a hug and asked where i went! :) and when i was crying last night my friend was rubbing my back and commented on my bones, which helped me stop crying. YAY!

Today/last night...

Mon, 05 May 2008 01:48:39 GMT

Urgh, So last night I got smashed, shit faced, wasted, every word for plastered you can think of. And I realized this morning, rolling out of bed, that whiskey and beer(my weaknesses for drank) have lots, lots lots, of calories. NO GOOD soooooooooooo I went on a 7 mile walk/run because it was a beautiful day but felt like shit because I had nothing in my stomach and I have a pounding head hang over. And since tomorrow is Cinco De Mayo my mom who is not even mexican(no one in my family is) decided she wants to make a big mexican feast, and mexican food is my weakness, OH NO!
but I'll just talk alot at dinner that seems to get me out of eating, and my parents get annoyed because they like to eat and not talk, lol so they tell me to go work out or something and than I can, and I dont have to eat.

OH and exciting!! I went to the grocery store I got some chicken brother (there is like 10 calories in a cup!!!!) and Tuna Cups which have like 80 calories, but they have 16g of protine, and i love tuna!!! And my mom bought brocoli and carrots! Which I'm really happy about!
I love healthy foods. EW last night people were eating like 10 oreos in a cup of 2% milk and there are like 180 calories or something in 2 oreos... and they had DOUBLE STUFFED! SICK! and they were eating hot dogs, and drinking regular coke, grossssssssss. Not that I should be talking with taking like 6 shots of Jack and having 6 Coors Light.... NAUGHTY! I'm sorry(to myself) But hey the good thing about the night was I kept my clothes on, I'm a naked drunk, and i was a good girl and kept them on lol. although i did cry to my friend about my body, and he didn't know what to do, i just was crying about it, then i stopped and started dancing lol.

well sorry to ramble but i just wanted to write!
Love
X's and O's
-Katelyn

Morning

Thu, 01 May 2008 15:05:15 GMT

Good Morning,
Actually I wouldn't call it a good morning, I woke up to the annoying sound of my mothers voice saying WAKE UP WAKE UP GET READY FOR SCHOOL! YOU HAVE TO EAT AND GET READY! I"M LEAVING BYE!!!
But there is one up side, So at my school we have different days Blue and White Days, on Blue days its Periods 1,2,3,4 which are an a hour and 30 min long. and white days periods 5,6,7,8 same 1 hour and 30 mins. MORAL OF THE STORY IS on blue day I have one class, Psychology, second period. so that means I have more time to get ready and do some sit ups and push ups(even if still I feel like shit.) So I dont start school until nine thirty! HOORAY!
And I've already drank 110 calories, I had some orange juice with three advil and three tylenol and 2 TSB of Dymatap lol. The reason I had this coctkail of pills is because I have a headache, back ache, ear ache, stomach ache, runny nose, watery eyes, and worst of all the SORE-est throat ever.
So I've had 110 Calories
For Lunch, I might pop a bag of 1-0-0 Calorie Pop Kettle Corn

and for dinner Some veggies!!!

Goood luck today!
-Katelyn

OH AND

Thu, 01 May 2008 05:37:25 GMT

about the ABC's there going well.. I haven't eaten at all today, and threw up all day yesterday because i'm sick. EH. But I'm feeling better. So I have school tommorow, And I'm totally eating some carrots and brocoli, gosh that sounds good.

Well I'm going to bed soon
Night Guys
Love you
Hope all is well!

-Katelyn

HI.

Thu, 01 May 2008 05:35:37 GMT

hello,
I'm sick. so sick. I've been throwing up for two days, and sleeping and coughing, and runny nosey. :( but here are some pictures from my prom

please dont think im super fat, cause im one of the bigger girls in here.
I'm super scared to put these up but i'm showing you guys anyways
<center>
<a href="http://i17.photobucket.com/albums/b68/lhscheerchick333/DSCN1297.jpg" target="_blank">
<img src="http://i17.photobucket.com/albums/b68/lhscheerchick333/th_DSCN1297.jpg"></a>
<a href="http://i17.photobucket.com/albums/b68/lhscheerchick333/DSCN1222.jpg" target="_blank">
<img src="http://i17.photobucket.com/albums/b68/lhscheerchick333/th_DSCN1222.jpg"></a>
</center>
The first one is me and j2 and the second one is me and alison
there are tons more but there hard to see cause there with a bunch of people

and i'm still pretty sure it didn't work... i dunno how to do it... but there are URL's

so about my senior prom last night

Sun, 27 Apr 2008 20:40:05 GMT

uhm... well my dress was tooo big for me! hooray, thats a good thing. And i had to binge because i fasted for two days before!!! anyways. the dance sucked so much! there was like 100 people there, and the music was no good. i wanted to leave asap but my group wasn't ready. after party was fun (thank god we didn't get anything to drink because alc has so many calories) and i had a snuggle sesh with my friend jake, which was fun. I dunno how I feel about it. But since prom is over, its back to the grind and routine of ABC!!! GAH! we'll I will upload some pictures from last night If you wan2 see, I dunno how to upload them onto my post! If someone could show me it would be awesome!!!

How is everyone else? I Missed You guys!
Love,
Katelyn

hmmm

Fri, 25 Apr 2008 03:22:43 GMT

sooo today, has been GREAT, although crappy at the same time. So i didn't eat anything, except for a few bites of frozen lemonade, and a bite of granola bar. and i drank soooooooooo much water. on the other hand bubba(my ex slash i dunno what we are boyfriend) found my pills in my bag, and my calorie counter, and FLIPPED OUT AT ME! he's like how much more weight can you loose, your skinny blah blah blah. makes me cry, and tells me to 'figure' my stuff out... which is weird, because i have my stuff 'figured' out. anger. But happiness at the same time because of my lack of calories today!

Love ya'll
-Katelyn

ps. I have a crush! :)

Good Morning( to me)! or afternoon, or evening depending on where you are!

Thu, 24 Apr 2008 15:19:50 GMT

I just woke up, got in the shower, and realized how tan I am! Hooray! (I've been tanning for prom! two days!) Anyways, I started my day with a cup of coffee and thats it. My pills and drink mix are in my car.
Wish you all the best of luck today, and wish my self good luck. I'm fasting today!

You know what always helps me, if I'm picking up something to eat, and I know i shouldn't eat it, is if you think about each individual ingredient being mixed together at a factory or something, EW. Like for some reason when I do that, I think about bread, and want to barf. Or like Fruit Snacks, or OREOS ew... the cream is like 97% fat.( and my mom always buys double-stuffed)

Wish me luck with my fast! I'm nervous! EEK!

"Think Thin"

Love Ya'll!
-Katelyn

wow sorry for all the post but

Thu, 24 Apr 2008 00:58:06 GMT

sorry for all the posts but I just remembered something. So my oldest brother has been in china since june ( i've lost weight since he left) but not enough, and I want him to come home and tell me that he thinks I lost weight. Because for some reason when my family tells me I look skinny I get incredably high, its such a good feeling. And ways he's coming home in like 60 days, I'm so super stoaked about it!!! :)! so I want to be skinny, skinny, skinny, not fat fat lardy when he gets here!

LOVE,
Katelyn

Better than Nothing Lyrics

Thu, 24 Apr 2008 00:46:33 GMT

I don't want to have to build this
I don't want to have to fit in
I don't want to have to need someone
But I do..

I don't want to have to attract boys
I don't want to have to be here
I don't want to have to eat to fill a hole
But I do..

But it's better than nothing at all
But it's better than nothing at all

I don't want to have to be angry at you
I don't want to have to blame it on my father
I don't want to feel sick around you
But I do..

I don't want to ever fall in love
I don't want to feel so insecure
I don't want to have to write this to explain
Still I do
This feels better than nothing at all
This feels better than nothing at all..

this song is so true. I don't want a boyfriend right now, i dont want to dislike my dad(but i do), I dont want to fall in love, I don't want to feel insecure. and the i dont want to be here,SCHOOL.

TODAY!

Wed, 23 Apr 2008 20:20:30 GMT

Has been good. I ate, Yogurt(125 calories) Apple(110 calories but i need the fiber) and Crystal Light Fruit Punch its so good and has no cals, and i had four bottles of water(pee'd non stop today lol) and a diet coke! GO ME! butttttt i had a 100 calorie pack of cookies which i feel kinda guilty about because i was supposed to be fasting today, tommorow, the next day, and the day after that, but I got my pills yesterday and you have to have something in your stomach for them to work! BLAH! And I just got home from school(worst time of the day for me because I want to eat so much!) so I decided to get on here, for some reason I really!!! wanted to write today. SLASH i needed support because I dont want to mess up! GRR.
And I have something to say, How come people get upset about the word Pro-Ana? like personally i dont have a problem with it, or saying i have Pro-Ana Friends or wat ever, is there something wrong with that saying?

AND does anyone listen to music that motivates them to stay strong and think skinny? There is this sone by Maria Mena, called Just a Little bit.... and its so good, and its soo motivating "just a little bit stronger, just a little bit wiser, just a little less needy, and maybe i'd get there, just a little bit pretty, just a little more aware, just a little more thinner and maybe i'd get there."

MAYBE I WILL GET THERE! I want to reach my goal weight so bad, and All i think about is my weight, what i can and cannot eat. so can anyone tell me some other songs that will motivate me?!

thanks!
good luck girls!!!
&hearts; Katelyn